HelpMe.com

I love my fiance very much, but his ex girl friend is really getting on my nerves. They were together four years, and she cheated on him with his best friend. We all have the same friends, and she’s always around..and she’s always trying to flirt with him. I want to say something to her, but she’s kind of scary. She’s one of those girls that love to fight, and I refuse to ever engage in that because it’s trashy..and immature. Now she has my number for some reason, and is constantly trying to find out what me, and my fiance are doing. I believe it’s because she wants to get close to him. I’ve told my fiance this, and he just says that he loves me, and only me…and to just ignore the texts. But all her flirting, and telling me their soul mates is killing me!

FMEE answered:

You and you fiancé have to come to terms with who you each were before you got together. You had boyfriends, he had girlfriends and you now have friends that are guys and he has friends that are girls. You ether trust or you do not. If you say you trust you must trust. A marriage is just a relationship to the next level, and needs to be worked at just like when you were first started dating. That does not mean you will ever trust the ex. But if the flirting is killing you now then when you get married it is going to get worse.

IthilienDude answered:

You haven’t blown up in her face? Excellent job, dudette. I would’ve killed her aaages ago =P
But seriously. If I were in the situation, I would 1) talk to the finacé, and 2) talk to the ex-girlfriend. Don’t drop to her level if she picks a fight (but I’m sure you’re aware of that already! =D) and make sure she knows where she stands.
As for the fiancé, just explain the situation in its entirity: how it makes you feel, how you feel uncomfortable etc. I’m sure he’ll be much happier for knowing, in an odd sorta way… =.
Hope I helped! x

unnatural answered:

she may be trying to get back with him, and you are being responsible about it. I think that you need to confront her, but be completely mature about it. If she wants to pick a fight, then that’s what she will do. but it really says something about you if you ignore it while she’s trying to fight with you. It makes her look childish. But you definently need to say something. Also, try talking to your fiance. Tell him how you feel, but don’t make it seem like you don’t trust him. Just let him know that she is bothering you and that you tried to take care of it, but it’s not working. good luck!

MrFantastic answered:

I think your choices are these: you and he do nothing (though, really, he if anyone should) and she’ll likely get tired of trying or just be annoying to the point of her publicly embarrassing herself in her attempts to get attention. If it were anything less than that, they would likely still be together. Number two is if either of you do something, it’ll just feed her until she does something to publicly embarrass herself. Number three is the question of him. Keep an eye on him if decide to go passive with her. If nothing questionable comes up, I’d say you’re probably good. If it’s out of character for him to not be able to do this or that with you in person or email or text and that starts happening, be mindful. Other than that, maybe she’ll get another hobby.