Sally H. asked 08/26/2010:
I was told that I’m different because I make choices with my head and not my feelings. It sounds like a good thing but I think I drove someone away because of the choices I made… I do my best to base my decisions on what’s best for that person, ignoring how I feel about this person. And it’s caused some people to believe false things about me… they accuse me of all these things and I start to believe it.
How do I change the way I think? Is it really bad to think with your head instead of your heart? Or do I just do both? I’m so confused.
5 answers
Kathleen Wynne answered:
I’m the same, sucks sometimes! Just make sure that you factor yourself and what’s best for you into the decisions you make :)
DeadInTheWater answered:
Making decisions on an empirical level(using your head) is called pragmatism, it’s logical,well thought out, and accounts for a large number of factors involved. Unfortunately, when you make decisions this way others tend to see you as cold, analytical, and dispassionate. It’s one of my biggest problems too. Changing the way you think is a larger problem, especially if you’re a pragmatic person. Trying to make a decision based on your feelings when your head is screaming that it’s a bad idea only makes those decision half-hearted(pardon the pun). The best way to go about it is to think of those decisions as a gamble. Go with what you want and if it works out great, if not just consider it another of life’s lessons learned. But above all enjoy any and every experience you have good or bad.
lee lee answered:
well, what i got in my Decision Support System course in my college is that making decision we have to put our head and our hear in, that is what differentiate human and computer.
yes, i think that is true, but the true is who we are, we as human always learn to be better and better, mistake makes us better. sometimes the doubt is coming into our head and cause we made a wrong decision.
good for own self is not always good for other, and good for other is not always good for our own self.
what i can tell is, let’s think about the rick that will appear because of our decision before we making a decision. do us ready for the risk? is it worth? can we respond it?… if you say yes to all the question then just make the decision. but stay in believe yourself.
who you are is the matter.
Sally H. answered:
@Tazz – Thank you so much for your advice! What you say is true, and you’ve helped me realize this. :)
Tazz answered:
Screw other people
As long as your true friends and you know the truth, it doesn’t matter what your peers think.
And it looks like using your head instead of your heart in this instance means that you are selfless, and for that I entirely respect you.
Don’t believe what other people think or accuse you of, as long as you know the truth just stick to what you know is right and stick through it. Theese things wash away after a while… usually :)
I get rumours and accused and whatnot, but I just ignore them. My friends know the real me, I know the real me, my boyfriend knows the real me, my family knows the real me, and that’s all what really matters x